Goosewings Denies Waterfowl Play

[Coprolite]

Goosewings CEO Tim Timmerson has been cornered and grilled outside of Winnipeg's hottest new flannel bar by investigative reporters from CBC's The Fifth Estate in the wake of the unprecedented closure of Toronto International Airport at the hands of flocks of extremely unruly Canada geese. Timmerson is seen flop-sweating in a tuxedo of Manitoba tartan plaid before the camera lights.

"No, no. Goosewings had nothing to gain from the incident in Toronto! We serve them with flights from both Edmonton and Winnipeg!" exclaims Timmerson.

"Mr. Timmerson, where were these geese at the time of the incident?"

The camera shifts to seventeen Canada geese that are following him in the line. The second one from the back honks indignantly.

"NO COMMENT!"

"Mr. Timmerson, what do you say to accusations that your airline is extremely silly?"

"NO COMMENT!!" Timmerson replies, as he climbs into an AMC Gremlin followed by all 17 geese.