Santa Monica & Pacific Airways

[TheEdge]

Good morning, afternoon and or evening to the people of Los Angeles, California and anyone else with some dollars to burn. Chad Studdington here, eccentric British millionaire, horse tamer, lion rider and owner of the loudest tweed jacket yet developed by science. Ever since being stranded in Los Angeles in 1945 after a bet that went badly wrong in a USAAF officers mess involving some unpleasantness with a capybara and a Turkish bath I have been banned from using any ocean liner, ferry or fishing vessel to leave the USA. As such I have adopted it as my enforced home and have decided to make a go of it.

One day, lion riding some trails in the beautiful Santa Monica mountains I realised there was large, fully developed airport in Los Angeles that for some reason no one was allowed to use until the 1st August 1950. Ever since I have been putting together a scheme to get myself back to the UK one day in the simplest way possible. That's right, by founding the greatest airline California has ever seen!

It seems a few others had the same idea but we'll ignore them. We've picked only the finest airliner-developed-from-a-strategic-lift-aircraft-developed-from-a-heavy-bomber, the Boeing 377 to fly our new customers across the great United States. If its progenitor was good enough to obliterate Japan then its sure good enough to get you to a week of debauchery in Las Vegas, hiking in the Pacific Northwest or fighting with random people in New York. Our air hostess have been selected solely on their ability to make a Singapore Sling and our ground staff the cheapest non union we could find hanging around. We aim for the stars so we can crash into the Moon.

We look forward to welcoming you aboard with a complimentary cigar.

Santa Monica & Pacific Airways - we'll probably get you there alive.