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Chuck Norris

Started by alexgv1, May 03, 2011, 06:54:26 PM

swiftus27

#60
Quote from: Boiler Dweller on January 02, 1970, 12:56:51 PM

Chuck Norris Once flew a Twin Otter across the Atlantic and made a profit.

With no passengers.  

swiftus27

I literally just made these up.

Chuck Norris is Bravo Airspace
Chuck Norris creates the weather so he has no need for ATIS
Planes are now going to be installed with NCAS (Norris Collision Avoidance System)
Chuck Norris never needs flight following.  He always lands where he intends to.
Chuck Norris needs more LEFT rudder.
Cloud separation laws exist so you don't accidentally run into Chuck Norris..... for your protection only.
Chuck Norris flies a VTOL A380.

Neotion

Quote from: swiftus27 on February 28, 2012, 09:32:23 PM
Planes are now going to be installed with NCAS (Norris Collision Avoidance System)

Which is futile, since you cannot avoid Chuck Norris, obviously.

Dave4468

Chuck Norris will only uses and always succeeds with the B747SP
Chuck Norris grounds volcanic ash clouds
Chuck Norris spends no money on fuel, he simply roundhouse kicks his passengers to their destination.
Chuck Norris doesn't fly anywhere, he jumps and the earth rotates below him

(I have a feeling I might have seen the bottom two elsewhere)

swiftus27

Chuck Norris has a long haul base at London City.
Chuck Norris can actually break the WTFUBER757 Frequency tactic for trans atlantic. 
Chuck Norris had a fleet of Comets that were too afraid to crash
Even Chuck Norris wonders what happened to the Star Alliance


Bolier Dweller

#65
Chuck Norris once mad a small prop airline profitable in AWS, with only one DC-3, in 2003.
Chuck Norris Is a Type Rating.
Chuck Norris doesn't do 7 day scheduling, he does 8 day.
If Chuck Norris want's to fly in P-56 Territory he can.
Chuck Norris  never declarers a emergency.
Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris name is a one liner.

Dave4468

Chuck Norris doesn't spam the used market, the used market automatically delivers him a constant flow of aircraft.
Chuck Norris once had a fight against two A340s, and thus the A380 was born.
The EU is on Chuck Norris's list of banned carriers.

NovemberCharlie

Quote from: DaveP1991 on February 29, 2012, 02:19:32 AM
Chuck Norris doesn't spam the used market, the used market automatically delivers him a constant flow of aircraft.
Chuck Norris once had a fight against two A340s, and thus the A380 was born.
The EU is on Chuck Norris's list of banned carriers.

I wondered how airbus got the idea! Thank you Chuck!

Chuck Norris can profitably fly the Wright flyer trans-pacific... With hundreds passengers... in two hours
Chuck Norris can dogfight with an A380 and win against a Eurofighter.
Chuck Norris is immortal, the 737 is seemingly immortal, is the 737 Chuck Norris?


Just my lines!

regards,

NC

swiftus27

#68
This one is topical:

This fully explains why I am so amazing at AWS (complete joke)


JumboShrimp

Quote from: swiftus27 on March 23, 2012, 10:56:24 PM
This one is topical:

This fully explains why I am so amazing at AWS (complete joke)


LOL.  That button (Remove Mentor), I would not be clicking it if I were you.  You never know how Chuck would take it...

Jona L.

Quote from: JumboShrimp on March 23, 2012, 11:59:11 PM
LOL.  That button (Remove Mentor), I would not be clicking it if I were you.  You never know how Chuck would take it...

+ With Chuck you'll win with a Piper PA on a 4000NM route versus an A333 because you can carry 10x as many pax!!

swiftus27

Quote from: JumboShrimp on March 23, 2012, 11:59:11 PM
LOL.  That button (Remove Mentor), I would not be clicking it if I were you.  You never know how Chuck would take it...

If you went through the interview process, you would know this to be 100% true. 

I still wake up at nights in fear that he is going to kill me.... Only to wake up and find a note on my mirror that reads "If I really wanted to kill you, you'd never know it was coming".

Zombie Slayer

Quote from: swiftus27 on March 23, 2012, 10:56:24 PM
This one is topical:

This fully explains why I am so amazing at AWS (complete joke)



"Cause the eyes of the ranger are upon you! Everything you do he's gonna see. If you're on AWS look behind you! Cause that's where the ranger's...gonna be!"....
Don Collins of Ohio III, by the Grace of God of the SamiMetaverse of HatF and MT and of His other Realms and Game Worlds, King, Head of the Elite Alliance, Defender of the OOB, Protector of the Slots

samrnpage


JumboShrimp

Chuck Norris doesn't get sunburned. The sun gets Chuckburned

Airbus101

Chuck Norris is already flying Cargo in AWS

problem with passenger demand is if Chuck Norris makes a route everone else goes to 0% LF.

Zombie Slayer

Chuck Norris does not like you talking about him.
Don Collins of Ohio III, by the Grace of God of the SamiMetaverse of HatF and MT and of His other Realms and Game Worlds, King, Head of the Elite Alliance, Defender of the OOB, Protector of the Slots

ARASKA

Quote from: Chuck Norris on July 11, 2012, 02:35:41 AM
Chuck Norris does not like you talking about him.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
This message has too many smileys. Please reduce the number of smileys.

Kadachiman

Chuck Norris Airlines uses F27's into Heathrow and Narrow Bodies with tech stops across the pond, and Jona doesn't say a word.

NovemberCharlie

Quote from: Kadachiman on July 13, 2012, 06:45:23 AM
Chuck Norris Airlines uses F27's into Heathrow and Narrow Bodies with tech stops across the pond, and Jona doesn't say a word.



nuf said  ;)