MUNICH, WEST GERMANY — In a bold move that industry observers are calling "technically legal," FlightClub has opened a new operational hub in Nürnberg. With no other airline establishing a hub in the city since Teutonia's brief and ill-advised expansion, FlightClub now enjoys uncontested access to the region's limited passenger demand. The new hub will support FlightClub's signature network of short-haul flights aboard aircraft best described as "nimble." Destinations will focus on regional cities within 200 miles — or slightly more with favorable wind. No long-haul, transalpine, or legally complicated routes are planned.
"People ask us how we choose our routes," FlightClub CEO Peter 'The Elbow' Braun stated. "And I tell them the truth: we're not sure there's any demand for a 6 AM departure to Zweibrücken. But we're going to find out."
The announcement was met with immediate backlash from Nürnberg residents, who staged a protest outside the airport terminal complete with banners, chants, and a dirigible painted with obscene slogans and designed to block departing FlightClub aircraft. Demonstrators decried the airline's sudden arrival, citing safety concerns, noise pollution, and a general sense of unease. In response, FlightClub issued a statement describing the unrest as "an encouraging sign of brand engagement."
Local officials responded to the announcement with visible discomfort. "We had hoped a more conventional airline would set up operations in Nürnberg. One with a track record of safety audits, scheduled flights, and, ideally, pressurized cabins," said Klaus Meier, Deputy Director of Regional Transport. "Instead, we got FlightClub." Meier went on to note that the airline's proposal was "handwritten, partially redacted, and submitted by courier in the middle of the night." He added, "We had numerous concerns. FlightClub addressed none of them and began operations anyway."
Despite the unrest, FlightClub remains upbeat. "We're thrilled by the energy in Nürnberg," said Braun. "It's not every day your brand inspires a full-scale public demonstration. That kind of visibility is hard to buy." He praised the protestors for their "creativity, commitment, and effective use of inflatable aircraft," and hinted that select chants may be incorporated into the airline's forthcoming advertising campaign.
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